top of page
Go The Way Your Blood Beats by Emmett de Monterey

Go The Way Your Blood Beats by Emmett de Monterey


An extraordinarily moving and original memoir of growing up gay and disabled in 1980s London.


When Emmett de Monterey is eighteen months old, a doctor diagnoses him with cerebral palsy. Words too heavy for his twenty-five-year-old artist parents and their happy, smiling baby. Growing up in south-east London in the 1980s, Emmett is spat at on the street and prayed over at church.

At his mainstream school, teachers refuse to schedule his classes on the ground floor, and he loses a stone from the effort of getting up the stairs. At his sixth form college for disabled students, he's told he will be expelled if the rumours are true, if he's gay. And then Emmett is chosen for a first-of-its-kind surgery in America which he hopes will 'cure' him, enable him to walk unaided.

He hopes for a miracle: to walk, to dance, to be able to leave the house when it rains.  But the 'miracle' doesn't occur, and Emmett must reckon with a world which views disabled people as invisible, unworthy of desire. He must fight to be seen.


 'Vivid, engaging...this insightful memoir sheds light on the author's life as a disabled gay man who is often rendered invisible' Andrew McMillan, Guardian Book of the Day

'A frank and intimate memoir written with an incredible clear-eyed intensity' Claire Fuller

  • Details

    Imprint: Penguin

    Publication Date: 27th June 2024

    ISBN: 9780241995785

    Format: Paperback

Notice to European Customers

All European Customers: You may be required to pay a local import tax on or before delivery for parcels entering the EU. Please check your local import rules for purchases from the UK.


Germany and Republic of Ireland: Due to a high return rate of parcels, we are sadly no longer shipping to Germany and the Republic of Ireland. 

bottom of page